Not Horse Related, sadly

Believe it or not it has been over a week since I was last at the barn. I officially have the horse D.T.s. I am beginning to question their existance, a problem that I hope will be remedied by going to the barn tonight and riding the crap out of the Burglar. Turdy baby! Momma's coming!

Ok, I was in New York City this past weekend and I have to share my impressions. New Yorkers are actually not that rude, I expected to be yelled at a lot, but I wasn't. Once I figured out that there is no way to get actually get out of anyone's way, and they don't really expect you to, me and NYC got along just fine.

I was expecting New Yorkers to be more like circuit people, yelling at you, cutting you off and agressively passing, but New Yorkers are much more polite than circuit people. Go figure.

New Yorkers wear ridiculous shoes, and they walk A LOT. That city must be the bunion capital of the world. They wear shoes like these: young ladies and really old ladies alike. zoinks. The other thing I noticed about New Yorkers is that they will wear absolutely anything they can get their hands on, on their head. I swear knitted monstrosities, gigantic rabbit fur Russian hats, beer can hats, kittens, potted plants, you name it. Do you know what an effort you have to make to wear gigantic bug-eye sunglasses on the subway? I can not imagine taking them off, navigating your way to the platform, then sticking them back on for the train ride any more than I can imagine actually making it to the train with them on and NOT hitting the third rail. Fey scarves are pretty popular too. New York guys wear the gayest shoes I have ever seen. Really, really gay shoes, and New Yorkers? what is up with the leather coats? do they give those away with NY state I.D. cards and Metrocards? They are really tacky and ugly. Yuck.

Here is a tip for OLD New York ladies, ass loads of make-up, dyed red hair and high-heeled cowboy boots are not a good look for you, you look like a washed up pole dancer from Reno.

Here is a tip for tourists, don't wear your NASCAR coat, and leave your chick with the over-curled, 'I have never been out of Indiana' bangs at home. I will say that hanging out with midwestern tourists is a lot of fun, but why on earth, would you go to a planetarium show at the Natural History Museum in NEW YORK CITY if you are a creationist? Do you like slamming your dick in the door? (don't answer that, you probably do, you sick evangelical bastard).

I did find a western shop in the Village, LOTS of pointy toed boots with fancy high heels. The great thing about it is that the "city folk" are SO getting hosed, a 2x felt hat for $150 bucks and Justin Basic ropers for $169. Tee hee, hillbilly's revenge.

Ciao!