Ugly Ugly Tack

Hello Everyone!

Uneventful lesson last night, trail trail trail, I am living, eating and sleeping trail. Watching youtube trail videos, thinkin' 'bout lope poles, trot poles... up and over, turn, TURN!

Today's topic is ugly tack, I took on "buckleseat" a couple of weeks ago, so now it is western's turn. There is a piece of tack that I hate so much that I can barely write about it without blacking out. It is the breast collar, I hate it, it is ugly and useless, and if you find it useful, you are doing something stupid. To the right you will find some lovely examples of nylon breast collars mmmmmm, soo purty. How about that sweet purple one? I am sure it would look super cool while gaming. But you know, if you don't want all that nylony-ness. There is this butt ugly model, for the workin' hoss.

If you aren't wrasslin' doggies, and lets face it, no one is doing that, why would you have one of theses things? I suspect gamers use them, I have no proof of this, but I think I am on to something there. The thing I really don't understand is when people use them to show western pleasure, horsemanship etc. I know, it is more space to throw silver but, its ugly. I would hope nobody would go out an buy a silver breast collar, I mean I can understand the 4h-y mentality that dictates 'if it came with the saddle, I'm gonna use it' but does anyone actually purchase these thing independantly?

The next ugly piece of tack is perhaps, the most ghoulish devices ever created. It is: romel reins. Now, because God hates me, I think I am actually going to have to use this "thing" for my trail classes eventually. I can hear my sister laughing at me right now, it is a hollow, joyless laugh. Look at these things, they are horrible, it looks like a snake that swallowed some legos, ugh.

No! I have it! they look like the stuff people crap out when they go on "cleansing diets" and take a picture of their poo and send it to the detox diet site on the internet. Really what color is that besides baby diarrhea brown? they don't come in any other color, I checked. O. K. I am sorry that was really gross, but sometimes the truth is disgusting.

The next thing falls into a category into which I try not to delve too deeply. There seems to be some fascination with dangly things, not just any dangly thing mind you, but dangly things made of horse hair. As I suspected, whilst doing my research instead of working at my job, I have found that this is some kind of vaquero ranchy california thing. I am seeing a disturbing trend here. Here are some lovely examples of the dangly tack:

Look, it even comes with a breastcollar, (of course it does).

Apparently you can attach these dangly things anywhere you like, look really closely at the following image, under the horse? hell, why not? Look at all the crap going on here wow, white noise for your eyes. Of course it has a breast collar, and lots of ropy, tie-y things. The image to the right, THREE? tassels, is this really necessary? How many flies are you people expecting? Well that is about all I have energy for today. There is more ugly tack, I assure you. We will get to it all I am sure. Western clinic tonight, I will update you all on the relative burglary-ness of our ride.

Ciao!