Oh, dear Lord, I try to be good, I really try. Then you make me go to the 4H tack sale, and now I am sure to secure my place in hell.

You know those horse barns that aren't very clean, that have a mixture of hay, dirt and little scraps of useless, dirty leather horse-related things in the corners. Now imagine you take a shovel, scoop out all that crap and dump it on a table. THAT is what the tack sale is like. Doesnt' anyone own anything decent that they want to sell? You dont HAVE to sell stuff, you know, I know you loved your old crap from the '80s but no one wants it, they don't want it even if it was free, which it isn't.

Anyone who says that the United States is a "throw away" society has obviously never been to a 4H tack sale. I have been going to this same tack sale for over 5 years now, and to the lady with the dressage saddle that is so sun faded that it is now a lovely army green color, no one is going to buy that thing, why don't you GIVE it to a really poor kid or donate it to a theraputic riding facility or something. If no one wanted to pay $1 for the ugly, upholstry fabric bright purple vest with gold sequin slashes on it LAST YEAR the chances are pretty good that you can throw it away an not feel guilty about it.

The tack sale is funny because you have the cheapest people on earth both shopping and selling, so when they have something they consider "good" they ain't givin it away, you can be sure. So the cheapest people on earth are sniffin around and turning up their nose at the very same crap that they themselves are attempting to sell on their own table. It is a very surreal experience. No, you aren't going to get a Harris saddle for $300 bucks, but NO your 25 year old used up Steve Flick saddle isn't worth $3,500 dollars either. $200 for a low-midrange show halter? Is this a bargain? not really, you can get a low-midrange one for that price that is new AND clean!

Here is a tip for anyone looking to outfit themselves for showing at the 4H tack sale, this is a band uniform, as far as I can tell it is a simply lovely band uniform. What it isn NOT, however, is a show shirt, as a show shirt it is ass-ugly. Do not buy anything with bones on it, you know those "Adam and the Ants" shirts from 1982? Unless you plan to roll as a dandy highwayman, step away from the table.

So what should one buy from the 4H tack sale? I liked the popcorn, that was good. Why are all the bits at a tack sale 4.5"? What horse has a mouth that small? the answer is none. They are at the tack sale because when they were purchased they were too small, and now you are hoping that some other idiot will buy them just like you did. Oh, something else, steer away from sequins, they are universally horrible, especially when they are tarnished sequins (oh, yes I did see that!) on a garment that was gotten when the ringmaster of Barnham and Baily circus thought it was too ugly to wear. It had gold, purple, green and black tarnished sequins

So what did I find? a pair of spurs for a few bucks less than I could buy new, and I don't have to wait, hey I consider myself a winner!

Ciao!